原文：（目前reddit原帖已被本人删除）

I have 280k in medical school loans. My wife has 0 student loan. My parents agreed to pay off my loans so I can save on paying interest. My wife knew about these loans prior to marriage and understood I would need to pay my parents back. My wife now does not think it’s fair she came with no student loans. I make around 6x more than my wife bc of my education. My wife thinks her parents are being punished for having paid off all her education (college and masters). My wife also points out her parents helped substantially in raising our two kids for the last 5 years (cooking, cleaning, taking the babies at night, live in babysitting, etc) while we work. I owe my parents 280k. Wife wants us to pay her parents 280k as well.

Edit: Wife’s parents paid around 200k of her education which we are not expected to pay back. Wife’s parents are well off financially and do not need money. Wife parents love their daughter and wanted to help with the kids for free. But we paid them 1000 a month.

Edit 2: In laws do not need or want the money for her education. This is only my wife wanting fairness partially attributed by cultural differences in which parents are expected to pay for all upbringing of children including higher education. I however grew up in the States and do not have the expectation that my parents owe me this.

Edit 3: In laws spend the 1000 we pay them to buy groceries for us and to buy things for the kids. If we proceed with paying wife’s parents for student loans, I am certain they won’t spend a dime of it. They will likely leave it for our kids or eventually for us. Her culture expects us to take care of her parents when they get older, living with us, and supported financially. I plan on doing the same for my parents.
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该帖荣获当日十大第6，奖励楼主8分以及12华新币，时间：2023-10-24 22:00:02。

忍不住又去想人生归属感文化差异这些

应该很快能赚回来的呀。

父母要求归还28万学费无可厚非。

老婆父母不要女方归还20万学费我觉得也合情合理。

看父母意愿，孩子和父母的事情，配偶不要去干涉。毕竟以前他们是一家人，这笔债务发生在婚前。你也是知道才进入婚姻的。现在要求也给自己爹妈20万学费是补偿心理。 不能说我父母不要求回报所以你父母也不要求回报。 每家人的想法做法都不同，大家互相尊重吧。

理性思维，不要道德绑架。

问题是现在还债的钱是夫妻共同财产。这个事无解。要不说门当户对最重要。

是美国丈夫娶了一个亚洲老婆（可能是中国的）
俺觉得如果在美生活，还是要入乡随俗吧，毕竟她之前已经做出了选择。
我支持这位丈夫付他父母280k

等他还完债再嫁。

如果你动用父母CPF念书，毕业是要强制归还的。更别说现金了，如果父母不要求还我觉得是情分，不是义务。
学医的费用也不是每个父母能负担的，背后的故事我们都不知道。

抱歉。。。。。。自己也是父母辈了，能培养出医生的家庭真的很不容易。

最难就是在本地读医科了。都一个坑位一个学位的。非常能代入到这个要回学费的家长的心情。中间对孩子长期的支持读到医科付出的心血远远超过钞票可以衡量的。

拉着老婆苦熬两年一起还了28万后，然后和老婆闹离婚一拍两散？感觉老外离婚很正常

坡坡这里父母也是不给孩子们还大学学费。所以咱们中国过来的，也要记得入乡随俗，随大流，让自己的孩子带着贷款进入婚姻，减少未来孩子们之间的矛盾。

。。。

你父母要求回报那我也可以替父母要求一个回报，
拿200k随便买个什么保险也好，既然你要划清楚，那大家都划清楚
父母的情分要回来不过分吧，拿夫妻共同财产贴补父母还有理了，

这个wife既然能讲出这个话，这钱必然也不是老公一家吃糠咽菜省下来的，要不po主肯定自己说了，哪有什么“背后的故事”

以为谁稀罕医生的title

关键是现在男的收入高。

如果夫妻俩收入一样，我觉得给双方父母一样的钱很合理。

现在是男的觉得自己赚的钱要给岳父母，所以不乐意了。

如果遇到对方家长要还，那就对等待遇，如果遇到对方家长不用还，那就免单

对方家长的经济能力，孩子的经济能力，综合考虑

男生还要回部队一年半当军医，差不多七年，接着专科培训，再绑几年，薪水远不如律师甚至不如投资银行工作的。
刚毕业医学生工作时间长，早上天不亮就出门，天黑还没到家，经常值夜班，没有周末和节假日，春节期间也一样，根本顾不上家，除了GP, 眼科和牙科医生。医生的工作真的是要喜欢，不然很难坚持。

买房子要是有父母赞助，那不是更纠结。。。

所以不纠结

然后意见不合就离婚呗。就这么简单的事。

女方心里不平衡要，男的觉得不合理，有感情还能走下去就协调咯。我们外人起劲什么呢？不协调就离婚，就这么简单。